A total shocker....

Well not really but I still feel pretty numb. 7dp3dt and there was a second line. It started out really faint. In fact when I first saw it I though "please just tell me it's too early to test" because I didn't think I saw anything. Well it got darker and now it is clearly visible. I can't believe this might have actually worked. I'll test again Thursday morning just to make sure it wasn't the trigger but how could it be. I triggered on 8/7 and that was 12 days ago. That has to be out of my system by now right?!?! Oh please say yes.

It really doesn't feel real. Like I don't even know if I should say anything to Jamie. He didn't even want me to test so I already feel like I went behind his back.... not that that really matters now. But I don't want to tell him until it's really true... like when they call back with a really great beta. I just hope (and hope seems to be an infinitesimally small word for the feeling I want to convey here) that this little bugger... or buggers... stick around for the next 9 mos.

I did have two BFP dreams this week and let's just say my dreams are pretty powerful. The first one I POAS and it was positive... clear bright as day positive. The second dream ... last night I believe... was a bit weird. I was in a room full of women and while I really couldn't tell who they were bc there were no faces, it was like I was in a post from the nest. Like instead of everyone typing back and forth we were all sitting there talking. And the questions was something about old wives tales and being pregnant and one woman was talking about her grandmother who just KNEW when people were pregnant. So then magically this old lady appear in my dream and she looks me square in the eye and says "you're pregnant". Well I guess my state of paranoia about all of this not working was blocking my intuition. We'll just have to wait and see what numbers the beta gods bring.